Communication Tips.

Communication tips to the married couples. This is to the one speaking; Communication is an art which can be learned, and if we do it right, you and your partner will enjoy the communication even when things are not that good. When it comes to great communication, you can’t beat the simple advice of James. “Take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires” (James 1:19-20). That is easier said than done, right? In fact, this may be hardest to do in marriage because of the great potential to feel hurt by those we love. 1. Speak for yourself. Don’t mind read. Talk about your thoughts, feelings, and concerns, not your perceptions or interpretations of the Listener’s point of view or motives. Try to use “I” statements, and talk about your own point of view. 2. Talk in small chunks. You will have plenty of opportunity to say all you need to say, so you don’t have to say it all at once. It is very important to keep what you say in manageable pieces to help the Listener actively listen. If you are in the habit of giving long monologues, remember that having the floor protects you from interruption, so you can afford to pause for the paraphrase to be sure your partner understands you. 3. Stop and let the Listener paraphrase. After saying a bit, perhaps a sentence or two stop and allow the Listener to paraphrase what you just said. If the paraphrase was not quite accurate, you should politely restate what was not heard in the way it was intended to be heard. Your goal is to help the Listener hear and understand your point of view. Next time we will come with some tips for the listener.